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Best of the Babylon Bee: Passengers board final Spirit Airlines flight for one last brawl

New York Post·The Babylon Bee·27 days ago
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Every week, The Post will bring you our picks of the best one-liners and stories from satirical site the Babylon Bee to take the edge off Hump Day. Want more of a chuckle? Be sure to click the links.

Collage of a yellow Spirit Airlines plane taking off and a smaller inset image showing passengers brawling on an airplane.

Witnesses described a reverent atmosphere at the terminal, as longtime customers embraced, wiped away tears, and quietly slipped brass knuckles on before boarding began. READ MORE

Hakeem Jeffries speaking at a podium with American flags and the House of Representatives seal in the background.

“We have never threatened anyone,” said Congresswoman Rashida Tlaib. “And you don’t want to find out what will happen to the next person who tries to say we have.” READ MORE

Illustration of Donald Trump standing in front of a giant, fiery, transforming "Truckasaurus" robot, with the White House in the background.

“No one goes to libraries anymore,” Trump told the press. “They’re just a place for homeless people to use the internet.” READ MORE

Headline: "Newsom Says California Population Is Actually Growing If You Don't Count All The People Who Are Leaving."

At publishing time, Newsom had announced that California had also achieved a $100 billion surplus, if you didn’t count any of the money that the government spent. READ MORE

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