Wednesday 29 Apr 2026 TL;DR: GitHub used to be cool and now it’s a lame slop graveyard. GitHub is racing towards the mythical zero nines of uptime. Users are starting to notice that GitHub is now a Microsoft product. Eww! Official uptime paints a concerning chart. The missing status page tell a far worse story. Whatever the truth, it’s impossible to miss the delightful experience that is Microsoft GitHub if you use it semi-regularly. Line chart showing GitHub average uptime by month following the Microsoft acquisition. A green line turns into an orange and red roller coaster. GitHub’s Historic Uptime Microsoft acquired GitHub and applied their unique brand of enshittification. Amongst their achievements was the spawning of the Copilot circle of hell . Now they’re effectively DDoSing themselves with slop . I won’t dwell on what else went wrong. I don’t know and I don’t care. GitHub is impressively bad now. It’s embarrassing. Shameful.…