O n Friday, something surreal unfolded on New York ’s West 34th Street. The Empire State Building glowed cerulean blue, while a Hollywood-style carpet unfurled along the sidewalk. Then came Sarah Jessica Parker , flanked by a motley crew of A-listers — including Andy Cohen, Emily Ratajkowski and Winnie Harlow — all smizing for paparazzi to commemorate the opening of… wait for it…. A Primark . Yes, Primark, the Irish fast-fashion chain best known for bargains like “three thongs for £10 ($13.50).” The spectacle has already become the subject of online bemusement, particularly among Brits (myself included), who are struggling to reconcile the retailer’s mass-market reputation with the full celebrity fanfare of a Manhattan flagship launch. In the U.K., Primark occupies such an unserious place in the cultural psyche that we call it “Primarni” — a mashup of Primark and Giorgio Armani to highlight its cheap lovability — that you’d be hard-pressed to find a U.K.…