luulapants : Northern Cardinal, 4/10 I’m sometimes worried the male is sexually harassing the female but I’m pretty sure they’re just doing some elaborate public pickup roleplay. The rest of us didn’t agree to participate in your kink, guys. American Robin, 1/10 Literally just some dude hanging out. Never bothered anyone but worms. Big fan of the way you just stand there in the middle of the grass like you forgot what you were supposed to be doing. House Sparrow, 10/10 You’re a gang. You’re participating in gang violence. There’s ten billion of you living in a single wood pile and it’s been civil war for three years now. When will the bloodshed end? Tufted Titmouse, 1/10 A shy baby. A pretty little guy. I saw you on the neighbor’s garage roof and time stopped. There were anime sparkles around you. Come back. European Starling, 9/10 Why is it always you? Listen, I know, I KNOW the sparrows are the problem, and YET.…