I don't who I am anymore Tired of not being good enough. Tired of not being the first choice. Tired of bending and breaking myself to be worthy of love. Tired of begging for attention and affection. Tired of waiting for someone who doesn't want to be with me. I never want to be Like this ever again. I want to be Strong. I want to be someone. I feel so tired. But If I stay still, I'll be waiting again. I can't do that. I have to stay busy. I'm trying to escape this voice in my head, that Sounds Like him, yelling at me, mocking me, telling me He hates me, despises me, never appreciated me and all the effort I put into this relationship. No rest, no pause. I don't know what's expected of me. I don't know what I want. I wish those Feelings would disappear. I try to soothe myself. Telling myself he cared about me, that's why He pushed me away. I got too close. He had affection for me. Maybe it's gone now, but that's nothing I'm allowed to think about anymore. I want him to be happy and healthy.…