The Onion’s plan to license Infowars and run it as a parody of itself just hit another wall. On April 30, a Texas appeals court paused the handover at the last minute, sending the whole thing up to the Texas Supreme Court and pushing the next hearing to May 28. So Alex Jones’ brand is, for now, sitting in a legal greenroom while a satirical newspaper waits to take its keys. If you have lost the thread, here is the short version. The Onion has been trying to get its hands on Infowars since 2024, when it won a bankruptcy auction with the backing of the Sandy Hook families Jones owes more than a billion dollars in defamation judgments. A federal judge tossed that auction over process issues. Then in August 2025, a state court ruled the assets would go to a court-appointed receiver. Two years and an unbelievable amount of paperwork later, The Onion came back with a new plan in April 2026. This time, instead of buying the place, they want to rent it.…