The Elon Musk-Sam Altman courtroom showdown already promised plenty of fireworks. And in its first week, dominated by the world's richest man taking the stand in a federal courthouse in Oakland, Calif., Musk v. Altman delivered more than a few whizz-bangs. Musk's goals on the witness stand were to explain his OpenAI lawsuit under friendly questioning from his own lawyer, and to not look too arrogant or ignorant under questioning from counsel for the OpenAI executives he's suing. Whether he succeeded in either sense is open to question — in part because Musk himself did not seem very open to questions. But Musk certainly succeeded in making more people aware of his ongoing romantic coparent relationship with his former chief of staff, and making many of us scratch our heads about what, exactly, the popular online acronym "TL;DR" stands for. So let's dive in to our own TL;DR: highlights from the Musk testimony we followed so you don't have to. 1.…